Comments on: Notes on Going off the Map

By: David Miller

David Miller — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 13:29:12 +0000

minimal spillage kate, thanks for asking, and for the nice words.

By: Kate

Kate — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 01:24:17 +0000

But how much wine did you spill? Any? Or are you that damn cool? Great read that got me thinking. Thanks.

By: Abbie

Abbie — Sun, 29 Nov 2009 22:14:20 +0000

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately, and what my family would think if I moved abroad… I’ve already gone from the east coast to the west coast, which was a big enough ordeal, but I have to agree with Carlo, and I think our families should see our relocations as awesome vacation opportunities!

By: Jared Krauss

Jared Krauss — Sun, 29 Nov 2009 10:09:04 +0000

You know, David, I feel a sense of relation to this set of emotions you portray here. When I started playing soccer with the kids in Lambeth Station (South London), it stopped feeling like a place where my hostel was located. I wasn’t moving to London, but where I am, where I’m sleeping, if I’m happy, is my home; home is where my heart is. I’d be walking down the street towards Borough Market- a ways away- past the little rubber, miniature soccer court and they kids would all stop playing to follow me on the other side of the fence as I walked by to try and get me to play with them. They’d see me on the way back, one or two of them, and they’d smile shyly, slowly raising a hand or two, toothy grins and dirty faces shining bright at me. It made me feel a part of the place. I can’t help but think back fondly on that place. I can’t help but feel like a part of me is still there. It’s a bit of a home.

Kids are honest. You have to love them for that.

By: Candice

Candice — Sat, 28 Nov 2009 18:33:58 +0000

Love love love these descriptions, especially the image of dribbling the ball with the wine cup in the air. I don’t think i’ve interacted with children on a level like that yet on my travels. I haven’t travelled enough long-term for it to be an issue with family or friends, but when I discuss the idea, nobody really seems to understand why I would want to do so. My parents are old, they want grandkids!

By: Hal Amen

Hal Amen — Sat, 28 Nov 2009 14:33:07 +0000

I reconcile my travels internally with the gut assumption that I’ll always “go back.” I’ve had many homes, but I’ve never reached the point where I can visualize 100% breaking away from *home*–the places and faces I was born into. Sometimes that makes me sad, and sometimes it doesn’t.

This is amazing writing, btw.

By: Nick

Nick — Sat, 28 Nov 2009 11:59:58 +0000

I found this piece very moving, David – thanks! I think you’ve beautifully captured the sense of dislocation that everyone involved feels when someone goes “off the map”. It’s interesting to see how you deal with it.

Holidays can be particularly difficult times.

I wish my mum would read this.

By: Carlo

Carlo — Fri, 27 Nov 2009 23:10:11 +0000

I reconcile it as being what I want to do with my life, and how I want to grow as a person. We have no choice as to what family we were born into so for me it’s hard to reconcile any obligation to stay near them just because they are family. Don’t get me wrong though, I love my family. I love my friends back home too, but the reality is that everyone moves on in life and as time goes on everyone drifts towards their own thing and their own passions. For the foreseeable future, this is mine.

By: tom gates

tom gates — Fri, 27 Nov 2009 22:44:49 +0000

my favorite food quote of the year: “emotionally bolstering doses of raw garlic, fresh parsley, and Malbec.” i’ve bolstered quite a bit that way, this year

By: Megan Hill

Megan Hill — Fri, 27 Nov 2009 21:59:31 +0000

Right on, David. I’ve never thought about what helps me move from that dream-like, fuzzy state that comes with an unfamiliar place to making it feel like home, but I think this piece will help me keep my eyes open to that, next time.

Nor does anyone in my family seem to understand the need to be footloose. And they probably wouldn’t understand why I find their stationary lives boring. My mom worries a lot, too.

By: David Miller

David Miller — Fri, 27 Nov 2009 20:35:57 +0000

bigup anna, thanks.

By: Anna

Anna — Fri, 27 Nov 2009 20:27:17 +0000

Love this David. So well written and gets those well-known “I’m away from where I know, but what do I really know?” kind of feelings…. keep on living fully, it’s what you do best and you inspire the rest of us to do

By: Michelle

Michelle — Fri, 27 Nov 2009 19:54:40 +0000

That’s the truth. No one knows a neighborhood better than a local child, for sure.

By: David Miller

David Miller — Fri, 27 Nov 2009 19:42:00 +0000

thanks michelle.

in the hierarchy of ‘ownership’ that goes something like (a) public spaces governed by the municipality, (b) front yards and driveways governed by people’s moms and (c) streets roamed and turned into playgrounds of kids and dogs, the kids are the default ‘rulers’ simply by their proximity to and time spent at ground level.

or at least that’s how i see it. property owners may have their names on the title, but its the kids to which the place really belongs.

which is why you got to get in good with them.

By: Michelle

Michelle — Fri, 27 Nov 2009 19:13:04 +0000

I just love your descriptions of the kids. I never thought about it, but you’re right – interaction with local kids is so telling, both about you and the place in general.