Looking downstream, Niger River. Photos by: Helen Lloyd

Number of days the locals in Faranah thought it would take: 1.5

Number of days we expected it to take: 10-14

Actual days spent paddling on the Niger River: 15

Rest days: 0

Photos by: Helen Lloyd

Nights spent in a tent: 14

Kilometres travelled by pirogue: 350

Kilometres which we spent out of boat, pushing or dragging it: 50*

Number of times we fell out of pirogue: 3 each

Paddles lost (and found): 4

Number of times we had to unload everything due to capsize and flooding: 2

Nails used to repair boat after crashing into rocks: 4

Number of chants of ‘1, 2, 3, Heave’ when attempting to drag boat in shallow water, over sand: 49*

Hippos seen and successfully avoided: 11

Rocks mistaken for hippo’s head: 27*

Photos by: Helen Lloyd

Snakes seen swimming: 3

Snakes that crawled under my tent: 1

Chimpanzees seen in the wild: 1

Chimpanzees seen at a rehabilitation sanctuary: 9

Bats seen: 4,751*

Dead cows floating in river: 1

Days without seeing any people: 2

Military officers who mistook us for poachers: 1

Number of times I asked, ‘Lars, did you hear that? in the middle of the night’: 4

Number of times Lars replied: 2

Fish caught: 0

Fresh fish bought: 1

Kilogrammes of pasta eaten: 3.15

Kilogrammes of rice eaten: 1

Kilogrammes of potatoes eaten: 1

Beers drunk: 5

Sunglasses lost: 1

Flip-flops lost or broken: 2 (both the right foot)

Sand-fly and tsetse fly bites: 309*

Millilitres of my blood spilled in my tent by sand-flies: 25*

Beers bought with money from selling boat to local fisherman at end of trip: 8

_________________

* Approximation

Community Connection

To learn more about Helen Lloyd and Lars Bengtsson’s adventures and charity ride through Africa, please visit their website, www.takeonafrica.com

Please submit By the Numbers submissions to david at matadornetwork.com

All photos by author

Number of cycle tours undertaken prior to Cuba: 0

Most kms cycled in one day: 105

Total kms cycled: 797

Average speed in km/h (due to gear, heat, poor roads, and poor conditioning): 13

Cities/towns slept in: 16

Nights spent in Cuba: 33

Nights woken by a rooster at 4:30 AM: 31

Days it took for us to get sick, most likely from the street food: 2

Street pizzas eaten, despite thinking that street food is what caused our being sick: 21

Flat tires: 3

Minutes to change the first flat: 27

Minutes to change the third flat: 14

Taxis taken in Havana: 5

Taxi drivers in Havana who had to stop to ask directions: 5

Waiting for replacement bus in Vinales

Dogs wearing ratty old t-shirts: 9

Flip-flops stolen by a dog: 2

Flip-flops found: 1

Men recruited to help search for missing flip flop: 6

Buses taken: 5

Hours spent on buses: 31

Hours spent waiting for a broken down bus: 2

Cyclists met on the road from:
…Canada: 1
…Spain: 1
…Austria: 2
…France: 2
…Germany: 3
…Netherlands: 2
…Cuba: 1

Times we had to beg for a room to sleep in because accommodations were full: 1

Official currencies: 2

Price for Cubans to take ferry to Cayo Granma in Santiago de Cuba: 1 national peso

Price for tourists to take ferry to Cayo Granma in Santiago de Cuba: 1 CUC (equivalent to 25 national pesos)

Hours spent on Internet: 4

Hours spent waiting for pages to load: 3.5

Beach days during:
…first half of trip: 0
…second half of trip: 1

Seconds it took to decide on a return trip: 0.5

COMMUNITY CONNECTION

For more images from Cuba, check out Carlo’s Photo Essay: Cycling Cuba.

Panoramic view of Tegucigalpa, Honduras. All photos: Global Medical Brigades

Hours on the plane, round-trip, including delays: 16

People seen and treated for medical concerns: 1,000

Medicines brought by volunteers.

US dollar value of medications dispensed: 5,000

Hours spent packing and organizing medications: 10

People seen and treated for dental concerns: 200

Times physically winced while watching tooth extractions: 5

Number of volunteers: 38

Doctors on site: 2

Gol!

Paramedics on site: 2

Dentists on site: 1

Orphanages visited: 2

Highly competitive soccer games started between volunteers and kids at the orphanages: 1

Age range of kids: 1.5 to 16

Reminders to avoid drinking or brushing teeth with tap water: 3

Times panicked because water got in eyes and mouth during shower: 1

Plantains, pre-slicing and deep frying. Mmmm.

Anti-parasite pills taken after touching down in Miami: 1

Anti-malarial pills taken before, during, and after trip: 16

Bags of plantain chips consumed: 5

Bottles of Chilean wine enjoyed: 8

Pounds lost: 0

Candid conversations with roommates about bowel movements: 14

Cold showers taken: 7

Group photo before going home.

Fantasies about having hot water: 7

Taking first hot shower after getting home: priceless

Hot lady cop escorts: 1

Political graffiti spotted: 4

Collective photos taken: 459

Bags of coffee bought: 3

Total mosquito bites on me: 0!

All Photos Eva Holland



 Starting Point: Ottawa, Ontario



Finish Line: Whitehorse, Yukon



Days on the road: 12



Days spent actually driving: 9.5



Kilometers driven: 7866



Time zones visited: 4



Provinces and territories passed through: 6



Dollars spent on gas: $960.98



Highest gas price paid: $1.19 per litre



Lowest gas price paid: $0.84 per litre



Cups of coffee/tea consumed: 24



PB & J sandwiches made and eaten roadside: 4



Power Bars choked down while driving in lieu of a lunch stop: 3



Fast food meals eaten (including Veggie Delite subs and Tim Horton’s bagels): 6



Fast food meals eaten (not including Veggie Delite subs and Tim Horton’s bagels): 1



Cups of Mr. Noodles prepared in gas station microwaves and consumed while idling in the station parking lot: 1



Strangers at gas stations who spotted my Ontario plates and told me I was “a long way from home”: 3



Days in which that sort of exchange was my most substantial conversation with another human being: 4



Gas station restrooms visited: 17



Gas station restrooms with sketchy malfunctioning locks that resulted in a trucker walking in on me: 1



Establishments dubiously named “The Beaver Motel” spotted en route: 2


Motel rooms rented (not at The Beaver Motel): 4



Dorm beds crashed in: 2



Friends and relations imposed on for couches, hide-a-beds and spare rooms en route: 3



Outrageously marked-up pay-per-view movies purchased in motel rooms: 1



Number of minutes spent waiting in line to see “The Twilight Saga: New Moon” in a mining town in northern British Columbia: 30



Number of times I was served by an Australian on a WHV at a coffee shop/restaurant/hostel in the Rockies: 5



Wildlife spotted roadside: 1 buck deer, 10+ elk, 4 coyotes, 2 bighorn sheep, 1 grizzly bear, 1 bald eagle, 5 moose, 1 fox, 60+ bison



Giant roadside “world’s largest” sculptures visited: 3



Number of times I topped up my wiper fluid: 4



Number of times I cleaned caked-on mud off my headlight covers: 3



Number of times I forgot to clean my headlight covers and drove blind through the darkness for an hour, following the tail lights of the car ahead of me and hoping for the best: 1



Days I spent dreaming about my next trans-Canada trip: Days 1 through 9



Days I spent vowing never to do another trans-Canada trip, and questioning why I ever wanted to do the first one: Days 10, 11



Days I spent dreaming about my next trans-Canada trip all over again: Day 12

COMMUNITY CONNECTION

Who doesn’t like a good road trip? If the open road is calling you check out 6 Rules of the American Roadtrip & The Great Matador Roadtrip: Vancouver to San Francisco

Harbor in Långedrag, near Gothenburg. Photo: Anna Brones

Number of SAABS and Volvos on the road: too many to count

Family members visited: 9

Family members that own a SAAB or Volvo: 8

Number of times I’ve traveled alone with my mother since the age of 15 before this trip: 0

Times my mother and I were frustrated about not being able to talk about people in public because they spoke Swedish too: 26

Cities visited: 5

Hours spent in Stockholm: 7

Hours spent walking in Stockholm: 6

Number of times I consulted a Stockholm map: 1

Total hours spent on trains: 9

Cost of buying Karlstad to Stockholm train ticket at last minute: 600 SEK

Crayfish consumed in one evening in Gothenburg: 7

Days spent in Sweden: 10

Days someone mentioned threat of Swine Flu: 10

Jokes made about Swine Flu: 2

Swedes I know who think they’ve had Swine Flu: 1

Minutes between landing in Gothenburg and seeing an IKEA: 11

Bags of Swedish candy brought back in suitcase: 6

Meals that included potatoes: 10

Meals of blood pudding: 4

Days with less than two fika (coffee break): 1

Starbucks sightings: 0

IKEA sightings: 3

Postcards sent with photos of topless sunbathers: 3

Topless sunbather sightings: 0

Articles read in newspaper about the Swedish Royal Family: 3

Times I’ve been to Sweden: over 15

Number of bright green, marzipan covered Princesstarta (Princess Cake) eaten: 1

Fast food restaurants visited: 0

Age that I first learned to speak Swedish: 0

Times I had to speak English: 0

Pictures taken with bikes in them: 53

Time in the morning people started buying liquor at Stockholm Airport Duty Free: 6

Cans of reindeer pate snuck through customs: 2

Woman in San Sebastian, Puerto Rico. All photos by author.

Weeks between receipt of guidebook contract and assignment due date: 8

Two of the features are about art.

Special features assigned: 3

Itineraries to write in addition to features: 2

Total number of pages to be written: 17

People and places to visit in order to write features & itineraries: Too many to count.

People who have said “Oh, have a nice vacation” when I mention I’m in Puerto Rico: 7

Times I’ve gone to the beach: 1

Minutes spent on single visit to the beach: 22

Miles driven in 10 days: 636

Flat tires changed: 1

Statue of Liberty in Arecibo. No, that’s not my rental car.

Number of bizarre monuments seen: 3

Business cards acquired: 60

Times asked if there was a cost to be included in the guidebook: 17

Wrong turns made on the Panoramic Route: 7

Minutes waited for only gas station within 30 miles to open pumps after gas delivery: 12

Small size Moleskine notebooks filled with notes: 1.5

Times I looked at my expenses and thought, “Maybe accepting this assignment wasn’t the best idea”: 59

Unique arguments I devised to convince myself all 59 times that accepting the assignment was a good idea: 7

Regrets: 0

Pages written since returning from on-the-ground research: .5

Months until guidebook is published: 12

All photos: author

Days in the city: 30

Sick days: 1

Days it rained during the dry season: 8

“Inca massage” offers: at least 200

“Inca massage” offers accepted: 0

Times I changed my mind on whether I liked “Cuzco” or “Cusco” better: 2

Plates of delicious ceviche eaten: 6

Plates of non-delicious ceviche eaten: 0

Guinea pigs eaten: ½

2-for-1 pisco sours consumed: ummmm…?

Random parades seen in the Plaza de Armas: 12

Times I was called “amigo” by a stranger: 300+

Hours spent in Spanish classes: 60

Spanish gaffes despite hours spent in Spanish classes: Don’t wanna know

Times I was led to a fire extinguisher (extintor) shop when trying to buy an extension cord (extensor): 1

Taxis taken: 0

Times I turned down a taxi due to my friends’ getting taxi-kidnapped in Arequipa: 5

Pictures taken of the famous 12-angled Inca stone: 0

Pictures taken of people taking pictures of the famous 12-angled Inca stone: 1

Times I wished my hostel’s advertised wifi was actually wifi: 60

Times I considered moving to a different hostel: 60

Hours spent in Norton’s Tavern uploading Matador articles: nearly infinite

Excellent vistas of the city enjoyed from the heights of San Blas: 30

Giant pigs heads I gawked at at Mercado San Pedro: 5

Plates of ¼ chicken and fries ordered from the guy on Choquechaca: 3

Tamales picantes purchased from the incognito lady outside Gato’s Market: 10

Jogs up the Cuesta San Blas in a desperate attempt to get some exercise: 15

Oral advertisements heard for the “Psychedelic Times: Summer Edition”: 7

Times I was offered weed in San Blas: 3

Dogs seen doing it: 30

Community Connection

For more travel by the numbers, check out this Notebook archives page.

Number of hours spent inside a plane to get to Paris: 20

Photo: pedrosimoes7

Number of screaming children inside the plane: 3

Stairs climbed to get to the top of the Arc de Triomphe: 284

Minutes spent recovering from climbing those stairs: 10

Topless woman seen: 12

Strange etchings found in the concrete: 1

Number of pastries eaten per day: 4

Kilos gained: 3

Number of French words known: 1

Fellow Australians found in one tourist spot: 23

Dogs seen in the airport: 4

Number of times I looked the wrong way before crossing the street: 7

Times I almost got run over: 8

Number of proposals seen: 2

Armless statues seen: 1

Servings of cold tomato soup eaten: 0

Parisians annoyed: 12

Number of French flags seen: 51

Phallic symbols climbed: 1

Number of stairs up to my hotel room: 36

Number of times I got a blank look from the hotel reception guy: 15

Hours spent lost in a museum: 3

Number of times I was slammed up against the language barrier: 11

Pyramids seen: 4

Number of statues mistaken for real people: 1

Palaces seen: 2

Times I ate at McDonalds: 7

Photo: geoftheref

Times I eat at McDonalds when at home: 0

Tour guides that were helpful: 0

Number of annoying aunties following me around: 1

Naked gold statues seen: 1

People seen going into confessionals: 0

Kilometers from home: 16,962

Snails eaten: 0

Number of buildings mistaken for the Notre Dame: 2

Priests found inside the Notre Dame: 3

Number of times I ate Daffy Duck: 2

Topless women seen dancing with snakes: 1

Clear blue skies seen: 0

Days spent in the city: 13

Days until return trip: 367

Community Connection:

Flat broke but pining for Paris? Check How to Move to Paris with No Money , Top 10 Free Things to Do in Paris & How to Enjoy Paris for Free.

Minutes it took to decide to move to Oaxaca after husband lost his job in Hidalgo: 3

All Photos: Ibis Alonso

Properties viewed: 12

Properties with complete houses viewed: 1

Properties with houses with the roof caved in viewed: 1

Properties with unfinished houses viewed: 1

Properties with unfinished houses purchased: 1

Windows installed: 5

Doors installed: 3

Floors tiles installed: lots

Solar panels installed: 5

Times I reminded myself to never, ever, think about “The Ring” while looking down the well: 27

Trips to buy materials stalled by teacher protests in Oaxaca: 3

Trips to buy materials stalled by burro-pulled carts making alfalfa deliveries in Tlacochahuaya: 8

Building code inspections: 0

Locally-owned businesses supported: 10

Friends and family members who donated their expertise and labor: 8

Round trips from Hidalgo to Oaxaca: 5

Households slept in while waiting for house to be finished: 3

Lots for sale nearby: 15

Family members and friends who have expressed interest in buying one of these lots: 6

Number of times I insisted to the neighbor that I didn’t want a puppy: 3

Number of puppies given to me anyway: 1

Sad, mangy dogs evicted from property after the arrival of said puppy: 3

Money left in our bank account in US dollars: $53.74

Nights we’ve slept in new house: 2

Nights we’ve slept insanely well and woken up to the sunrise over the mountains in new house: 2

All Photos by Lola Akinmade

People already standing in cabin before plane leaves runway: 3

Times asked for money before leaving baggage claim: 1

Bus Conductor

Average electrical blackouts per day: 2

Number of days of longest electrical blackout: 2

Generators replaced: 3

People hanging off the back (not side) of moving buses: 6

Highest number of riders on a single motorbike: 5

Average number of people packed into a 12-seater bus: 30

Number of police checkpoints between Lagos and Ondo: 33

Average distance in miles between each police checkpoint: 2

Times pulled over by police: 5

Times asked for money by policemen: 3

Giant African snails consumed: 16

Giant African Snails

Snails consumed in one sitting: 10

Chinese restaurants visited: 1

Fast food joints visited: 5

Hours wasted in traffic per day: 4

Number of times passenger side mirror hit by Okadas (motorcycle taxis): 3

Number of times passenger side mirror hit by policeman’s baton: 2

Times intentionally sideswiped by tanker-trailer: 1

Near fatal accident misses over 14 days: 28

Arguments gotten into with policemen ready to seize camcorder: 1

Plates of rice and chicken consumed over 14 days: 15

Average number of mosquito bites: 20

Goats are a delicacy

Interview conducted by fake newspaper journalist: 1

Money in Naira lost to fake newspaper journalist: 500

Goats killed for various celebrations: 5

Number of times “Oyinbo!” (White man) was yelled at fiancé: 4

Low hanging ceiling fan accident: 1

Low hanging ceiling fan accident by tall Swede: 1

Cold water baths taken: 18

Sunset along the lagoon

Mice spotted: 4

Mice killed: 1

Number of snacks bought while sitting in traffic: 4

Number of puppies spotted being sold in traffic: 2

Power outage at airport: 1

Number of beautiful sunsets witnessed: 4

High school mates reunited with: 10

Weeks spent: 2

Months till next trip back: 12

Community Connection

Have a By the Numbers you want us to read? Send to david [at] matadornetwork [dot] com

Ready to submit your trip “by the numbers”? Send to david@matadornetwork.com.

All photos: MC Lars

Consecutive hours spent driving from Brisbane to Melbourne after tropical storms canceled all Brisbane flights: 26

Hot girls from North Carolina we hung out with in Melbourne: 1

Non-annoying hot girls from North Carolina we hung out with in Melbourne: 0

Number of places we ate at that used the same wordplay in their titles that I had in demos for “This Gigantic Robot Kills”: 2

Number of monks who got drunk with us at a monastery near Melbourne: 5

Age of the oldest monk there: 92

Number of times I went to 7-Eleven for coffee: 12

How many days it took for me to learn the difference between “flat white” and “long black” coffee: 3

Number of comic book stores we went to in Melbourne that had awesome old-school Ninja Turtle toys: 2

Number of comic book stores that had the 25th anniversary re-releases: 0

How many koalas I petted at the Featherdale Wildlife Park in NSW: 3

The number of emus that tore up the cone with food for the wallabies when I was trying to feed them: 2

On a scale of 1 to 10, the determination with which DJ declared, “They can’t mess with me,” when we’d had enough of the emu terror: 7

My percentage of being Australian: 50

Distant second cousins and aunts and uncles I had dinner with in Melbourne on our night off: 11

Number of pages I got done for my graphic novel while traveling: 2

Number of pages I’ve gotten done since being back in California: .25

Number of times we listened to the new Eminem record: .5

Number of times we listened to Mewithoutyou: 7

Number of giant monuments to Australian “legend” Craig Giles in the small town of Finley: 1

Number of people in the touring party in Finley who had heard of Craig Giles: 0

Craig Giles, whoever he is.

The time I finally got to bed on our night off in Melbourne, as I listened to Bile on my iPod and wandered the streets, furious at my ex-girlfriend for something: 5

Number of times per week we ate at Subway: 4

Number of times I eat at Subway per week in the US: 1

How many times I told DJ I wasn’t going to drink at all this tour: 13

Whiskey and Cokes bought with our drink tickets at shows: 13

Number of female DJs at the Spectrum club in Sydney who had fun flirting with us: 3

Number of times I asked people about Alice Springs and was told that it was more expensive to fly there than to Asia: 5

Hours I spent watching YouTube videos about Alice Springs at our hotel when we had WiFi: 2

Number of times I’ve been to Australia: 4

How many people danced and sang with me after I played “Down Under” by Men at Work when I DJed after our Sydney club show: 8

On a scale of 1 to 10, how beautiful Australian girls are: 10

On a scale of 1 to 10, how much this second thing influences my decision to go back soon: 10

Community Connection

Headed down under yourself? Meet Matador’s Australia experts for insider tips, or read about the 15 things you can’t miss while you’re there.

Have a By the Numbers you want us to read? Send to david [at] matadornetwork [dot] com

Ready to submit your trip “by the numbers”? Send to david@matadornetwork.com.

Photos; Jon Brandt

Months in Ecuador: 9

Guinea Pigs eaten: 2

Times when cat calls were directed at me by large groups of high school girls: 4

Extremely awkward ‘kiss on the cheek’ screw ups: 8

Most consecutive days without speaking English: 4

Hours spent traveling on buses: 168

Nighttime bus hijackings: 1

Cities and towns visited: 22

Other countries visited: 2

Consecutive days seeing someone pee in the street: 270

Video by Jon Brandt

Soccer games attended: 3

Cock fights attended: 0

Cases of Malaria, Dengue Fever, Dysentery, or Swine Flu: 0

Average seasons per day: 4

Times summer was declared, only to be renounced the following day: 6

Major elections for a new constitution and president: 2

Number of meals served with rice: 230

Students taught: 126

Students who actually learned something: 8

Bootleg DVDs bought: 55

Bed bug scares: 3

Beer choices in Ecuador: 3-4, tops

Baltazar Ushca

Altitude-related beer explosions: 9

Times Facebook friended by random Ecuadorians I’ve never met: 7

In depth conversations about bowel movements: Any time 2 or more volunteers meet

Brutal sunburns: 2

Extra notches cut into my belt due to weight loss: 2

Hours of work per day: 4

Average games of Solitaire played per day: 25

Community Connection

Read Jon’s harrowing first person account of a midnight bus heist in Ecuador! Or, on the lighter side, learn how you can volunteer in Ecuador through the Experimental Learning Ecuadorian Programs.

Have a good “By the Numbers” you’re interested in submitting? Please send to david [at] matadornetwork [dot] com.

The author’s note on this photo: “I have no idea who this is.” Feature photo: Conscious Vision.

Days since leaving home: 150

Countries: 8

Blisters popped in the bathroom of a train: 2

Makeout sessions in a treehouse: 1

Hours spent on planes: 81

Fantasties about quesadilla grande from Tortilla Flats in NYC 150

Number of upgrades to business class: 3

Chinese meals eaten in Paris over 24 hours: 2

Times gone to grocery store without environmentally-friendly bag purchased specifically for grocery shopping: 11

Times gone to grocery store: 11

Number of people befriended on anti-depression drugs: 4

Scorpion Fish nearly touched: 3

Dollars spent frivolously on sneakers: 160

Tim Patterson

Pictures taken in which it looks like Matador contributor Tim Patterson and I are on our honeymoon: 8

Days that I enjoyed being in India 1.2

Nights slept in India with picture of Jesus present: 7

Imodium Emergencies: 3

Imodium Emergencies Not Handled In time: 1

Times nail-clipper thingy has been bought and lost: 4

Number of Ambien left in a bottle of thirty: 6

Times my mother has figured out how to check her email since I’ve been gone, despite explicit instruction, notes, private tutoring, etc: 0

Subpar pizzas eaten: 6

Hours spent in buses designed for short Asian legs: 18

Times I’ve fantasized about snuffing out a dorm snorer with a pillow: 7 to 20

Girls who have mistakenly hit on me: 7

Girls who have still tried to kiss me even after “the talk”: 2

The statue.

Times a little turned on by a statue: 1

Number of pictures on my camera with people whose names I can’t remember: 12

Number of these people who are friends on Facebook: 10

Number of museums I’ve been to in five months: 5

Longest number of days without shaving: 3

Longest wait for a visa: 5 days

SIM cards purchased: 8

Hours spent looking for Wi-Fi in foreign countries: ∞

Community Connection

For more on Tom’s journey, as well as his epic adventures with Tim Patterson, check out Tim and Tom’s Excellent Adventure, and Whilst Traveling via Eurail.

Have a good “By the Numbers” you’re interested in submitting? Please send to david[at]matadornetwork[dot]com.

All photos: Rob Gain

• Days in the Middle East: 76
• Days without a haircut: 85
• Countries: 6

• Friends made: 59
• Homes invited into: 5
• Times: robbed: 0
• …sick: 0
• …food poisoned: 0
• Ripped off by cabbies: 3
• …with help of Israeli border patrol: 1
• Dates with Muslim girls: 3
• Marriage proposals by Muslim girls: 1
• Hours spent on buses circling Turkey: 81
• Obama sightings in İstanbul: 2
• Times stopped by Egyptians just to be insulted: 2
• Candy bars per dollar in Jordan: 7
• …in Israel: <1
• Days passed before I realized it might be a good idea to learn the local language: 1
• …for reasons other than meeting girls: 37
• Days to go: 934

Please check out Rob’s blog at Matador for more on his incredible travels + incredible photos.

Community Connection

Do you have a trip or something related to travel or place that’s worth telling by the numbers? If we’d love to hear from you. Please query david [at] matadornetwork [dot] com