You can use several arguments to counter the haters; I usually just smirk and laugh at anyone hating on me because I am American, but now and again you have to put the smack down. Here are a few lines I have used with some success:

“America is diverse, fool!”

This is a good one to start with because it cuts right through the bland generalizations haters like to make.

Begin with a geography lesson: America is one of the biggest nations on the planet and has 300 million people. Bring up New York and San Francisco as paragons of multicultural virtue.

Mention the fact that the coasts tend to be beacons (and exporters) of some of the coolest things the modern world has, such as music, fashion, slang, organic stuff and other fine examples of enlightened and vibrant societies.

The great city of New York. Photo by Thomas Hawk

It is always good to blame the bad impression people have of America on Texas, and then counter that with a small description of Austin. Tell haters that, yes, the Midwest can be pretty bad in terms of tolerance and such, but Chicago and Minneapolis are metropolitan cities with influence over swaths of the milk-bread countryside.

I like to tell people that in most American cities, you can have eggs and bacon for breakfast, fish tacos for elevenses, injeera with stewed veggies and beef for lunch, some pho for supper, and finish it off a dinner of some organic pasta with cream sauce and fresh sockeye salmon.

See what the haters have to say about that.

“America is beautiful, punk!”

The great beauty we have here in the US is not our cities, but the land.

Keep that old “This land is your land” song in your head and talk about the redwoods, the Cascades, the Blue Ridge mountains of the east, New England in the fall, Minnesota’s Boundary Waters, Florida’s beaches, Cali, Alaska and Hawaii, Vermont, Colorado and the Rockies, Big Sky country, the lazy overgrown South filled with peaches and willow trees and the like.

And then say: “Look hater, this is what we love about our country! We can go camping anywhere and maybe even meet up with a bear. I can drink from many, many rivers. I pick berries just outside of town. Road trips … what now!”

“Americans are friendly, chump!”

Contrary to popular belief, you will not get shot, stabbed, robbed, made fun of or ignored by all Americans. In fact, Americans tend to go out of their way to be friendly and accommodating to people asking for directions, a smoke, a light for a smoke, info on the cool spots around town and what to take on a camping trip.

Photo by -12°C

This is always nice when facing someone from Germany. Germans LOVE to hate on the US and it is always nice to have a couple arguments ready for these guys, besides the obvious WWII references. I am German myself and have spent a lot of time breaking my fellow Germans off some concerning America.

I basically bring up the whole “Germans are unfriendly curmudgeons” generalization and what ends up happening is, I say “Yeah, Americans are superficial” (gotta give your opponent something to play with) and they say, “Yeah, Germans can be pricks,” but WE are cool and represent the large part of the globally aware and socially responsible community.

Works for me.

“You are a hater, hater!”

This is what it basically comes down to. It’s so easy to criticize someone from the safe vantage point of ignorant hating, but once intelligence and critical thought come into play, all hating becomes silly and boring.

If you are meeting a traveler on the road, chances are he/she considers him/herself to be pretty smart and worldly. Appeal to this aspect of the personality and find common ground. Make a couple relativist arguments (of course after using one or more of the above) and show the hater that he is being a hater and that according to his own ethos, hating is wrong.

If you find yourself in Germany or Country-x-that-suffered-under-American-Imperialism, knowledge of history and patience may be required to bring the hater around. Let people know that, when a big international problem pops up, say Yugoslavia in the 1990s, Somalia, Sudan, Rwanda or the Middle East, everybody looks to the cop to fix things, then goes and hates on the cop for failing to do so.

Photo by [bastian.]

But I tend to go the other way and appeal to universalism instead of nationalism. It’s always nice to link with people regardless of what nastiness our (arbitrary) governments might be doing.

Links across (arbitrary) boundaries spit in the face of fascist, imperialist governments and lead to a feeling of hope for the future. Universalism is the one love future; nationalism is clinging to a hater past. This, more than all descriptions of America’s positive side, will be your most successful tool when dealing with a hater.

If all else fails, drink the punk under the table.

Community Connection

For more on being American overseas, check out Erin Granat’s feature article, Heroes or Hellions? How Americans Are Perceived Abroad.

Feature photo by Shek Graham. Photo above by bugeaters.

A dog is an indispensable companion on a camping trip. It will smell and hear things before you do, can help guide you through sticky underbrush, and, if well trained, find lost members of your camping crew.

A dog can warm you up, devour scraps around the fire, and just be there when the full moon rises.

I’ve slept next to dogs on several trips. Here is a short list of things I’ve learned about camping with a dog:

1. Pack extra stuff for your dog.

Bring a chew toy and some doggie snacks to keep your hound happy during the trip. There should be more than enough stuff to chew on in the woods, but just to make sure the dog doesn’t grab your hiking shoes or some other valuable piece of gear, bring a bone. If you have a bigger dog, it might be useful to strap a bag around his torso.

Photo by D G Brown.

2. Bring a whistle or leash or whatever it is you use to keep your dog under control.

I always like to let hounds run loose through the woods and chase some voodoo, but most dogs I have had will return when I call or whistle.

3. Bring a first aid kit for your dog.

He might end up finding a porcupine or, even worse, a badger or bobcat. If you’re camping, say, along the Appalachian Trail, beware of boar; in Alaska, watch out for bears.

4. Learn to recognize potentials dangers.

In addition to wild animals that might hurt your dog, remember all the weird and wonderful flora and fauna that your dog might ingest in his quest for knowledge.

A dog’s mouth and stomach are pretty tough and they can vomit up all sorts of things, but it’s good practice for you and your dog to get acquainted with the poisonous fungus and/or toads lurking in your neck of the woods and what the various treatments are. You might need antidotes; you might need to induce vomiting.

Photo by bugeaters.

5. Keep the human stuff locked down or tied to a tree.

This is good practice regardless of what kind of camping you are doing, but be sure to keep your dog away from the food supply. It doesn’t do to have your supplies torn into in the middle of a trek.

This goes for important gear as well: waterproof shoes and bags, flashlights and your compass, good woolen shirts, and the like. Dogs will tear into stuff when they’re excited and nothing is more exciting for a dog than a camping trip with Master.

6. Tie up your dog at night.

A lot of critters are about at night and your dog might be tempted to chase them; this could be fatal. Not only are you protecting your dog when you tie him up, but he is protecting you: nothing can come near your camp without your dog knowing.

Photo by Northern Xander.

7. Utilize your dog as a scout.

It is wise to sometimes send your dog first into caves, groves, gulleys, and other areas that you cannot see into. You might think this is cruel, but this is what dogs have been doing for millennia and they are good at it. In fact, they love it.

8. Form an ideal team with your canine.

A dog that listens to you, can anticipate your movements and is smart enough to balance out your blundering is a best friend indeed. Dogs operate in packs and you are the pack leader.

You might notice that in time you can just look at your hound, or make a small noise, and he will know exactly what it is you want. They like to circle around your path and come back to check in on you; they like to lead the way, and sometimes they like to have you lead the way.

Ten thousand years ago, men and dogs hunted together and were successful enough to build great civilizations. Put yourself in the shoes of prehistoric man and you will have a blast with your dog.

Community Connection

Going on a flight with your dog? Check out our article, Ten Tips for Traveling with Pets.

Goods: Need more advice? Check out Camping & RVing with Dogs